You're braver than you believe

Appearing successful and confident to other people is one thing – you have the grades, you have the awards, you have the class rank, you have the leadership roles, you show up on time, you are prepared to participate, you volunteer your time and energy. You’ve checked all of the boxes and everyone thinks you have it all together.

Believing in your own abilities to handle challenges, to persevere, to step up to the next level, and to continue to achieve at the high standards you have in the past is an entirely different accomplishment. It’s easy to put on a show for everyone else, it’s a lot harder to convince yourself that you are capable and competent. After all, only you know how hard you had to work to get here; only you know how many doubts you had along the way; only you know your struggles; only you are intimately familiar with all of your weaknesses and vulnerabilities; only you have heard your negative self-talk at your lowest moments.

We all get down on ourselves at times. When life gets hard and we aren’t sure we are up to the challenge, we question our bravery, our strength, and our intelligence. We call upon all of the times we have struggled and failed and then use those recollections as the basis for forming our beliefs about ourselves. We tend to forget to include all of the times we have worked hard and succeeded though. Our perceptions of ourselves are often not based on a comprehensive view of realty, but on those limited experiences which support our doubts and drag us down.

Fortunately, you can use fact-based tools to alter those flawed perceptions and help make your self-image more accurate. The next time you are feeling like you aren’t brave enough, strong enough or smart enough, try listing the times you were brave, strong and smart in the past. Use those victories to help combat your beliefs about your limitations and inspire yourself to believe in the best possible version of you.