Holiday Traditions

You are home for winter break. It’s time to reconnect with the friends and family who you have been missing while you were away at school. The holiday season is a great time to rekindle those relationships and let yourself sink into the reassurance of familiarity. Regardless of which holidays you celebrate, this time of year is full of traditions and memories.

Your favorite traditions

While you were finishing up your last finals and writing your last papers, you might have been daydreaming about going home to continue those traditions. What are some of your favorites? Getting a Christmas tree and decorating it, baking a fresh batch of sugar cookies, a special gift exchange with your cousins, taking a tour of the neighborhood lights, eating some delicious comfort food in front of a crackling fire? There are tons of wonderful winter traditions to pick from!

Some of your childhood traditions might not feel quite right anymore though. You have probably outgrown running down the stairs in your footie pajamas to see what Santa brought and you might have traded in your cup of hot chocolate for a latte. If you are feeling displaced this holiday season having outgrown your old traditions, but not having replaced them with new traditions yet, take a moment to think more deeply about those traditions you are missing.

Why are these traditions important?

What part of these traditions really feeds your soul? What fundamental need do your favorite traditions fill? Are your favorite parts of those holiday memories the connection you felt with others or the quiet moments you had to yourself? Some traditions are about spending time with family and making memories. Other traditions could be about giving and sharing with family, friends, neighbors or those who are less fortunate than you are. You might even be looking for the feeling that you are part of a community which you lost touch with while you were away.

If your old traditions are falling flat and feeling outdated now that you and your siblings and cousins are older, get creative. You don’t have to completely abandon the traditions of your childhood just because you are older. Find ways to modify your old traditions to fit your new adult lifestyle.

Traditions can (and should) change

Being flexible enough to allow your traditions to grow with you makes it possible to revisit the happy feelings of your favorite holiday memories year after year. By focusing on and maintaining what is really important about those traditions without obsessing about the details being exactly the same every year, you can stay connected to those you love and continue to make new memories.

When you get pushback from your older family members, ask them to think about the same things you did. What is it about this tradition which is important? Does every last detail need to be exactly the same to maintain the integrity of the tradition? Where can everyone let go and adjust without losing what is truly important to them about the tradition? What new ideas does everyone have to help the tradition evolve so that it continues to be meaningful and relevant?